Double-Secret, Double-Cheating Nupp Hack

If you are a hip, technologically-literate Estonian-lace knitter*, chances are you learned how to knit nupps by watching Nancy Bush’s instructional video on Youtube. If you happen to not be a goddess like Nancy Bush, though, chances are that your experience trying to reproduce her technique involved a whole lot of swearing and crying. Today I write to share with you my double-secret, double-cheating nupp-knitting method that is almost guaranteed to get you to the point where you can knit in front of your mom again, without her reprimanding you for your language and/or deciding that you have become emotionally unstable and need to start seeing Dr. Hyzin again.

I am presently back east visiting my family again (how could you tell?), and have been quiet on this blog because my time is split between (1) desperately trying to finish my dissertation chapter before I go on the vacation that Pat & I have attached to our trip up north for our friends’ wedding, (2) desperately trying to finish the Aeolian shawl that I plan to wear to said wedding, and (3) desperately trying to spend the quality time with my friends and family on the east coast that I came here in order to spend. But I am deciding today to take the time to write this blog entry, which has been kicking around in my head for a week or so, because my dear friend Rishi told me yesterday that he reads this blog because he loves my prose, even though he doesn’t knit a stitch. And that both warmed my heart and stroked my ego, and there’s not much more that you need in order to be motivated to write a blog post.

Okay, so the problem with Nancy Bush’s nupp method is that it’s physically impossible for most of us mortals to make the yarn-overs as loose as they need to be. When we go back on the purl rows, we discover that it’s next to impossible to get our needle-tips through all 5 or 7 or 9 loops, even if we are using Addi Turbo Lace needles like good little lace-knitting monkeys, and furthermore that even if we think we speared all those loops, it’s really hard to verify that we actually have, because once we’ve pulled our stitch through them and dropped them off the left needle, the whole thing looks like crap and we psych ourselves out thinking that this or that stray-looking loop is one we may have dropped. My use of the word “we” may have turned pathological halfway through that sentence, but it’s cool because my double-secret, double-cheating nupp hack solves both of these problems. Behold:

Cheat 1: On the right side, when you are making your nupps, keep your tension even and instead of loosening up, work each yarn over in the nupp as a double YO. So if you were knitting a 5-stitch nupp, you would work: k1 (leaving stitch on the needle), double YO, k1 (leaving stitch on the needle), double YO, k1. On the return purl row, simply pass all the stitches to your right needle, dropping the extra YOs, then pass them all back to the left needle — there will now be 5 stitches, or whatever number of stitches your nupp was supposed to have in the first place. Like magic, you have given yourself enough looseness that you should theoretically be able to get the tip of your right needle in there for the purl-5-together. Plus keeping your tension even should help make your nupps look more uniform. However…

Cheat 2: … you may find, even with this ingenious (if I do say so myself) double-YO system, that it’s still tough for you to have confidence that you are always spearing all 5 or 7 or 9 of your loops. If so, you can always slip half -1 of your nupp stitches to the right needle, purl the remaining half + 1 of the stitches together, and then pass the slipped stitches over. This way, you can count each and every one of those little bastards as you slip them over, and revel in your thoroughness.

For now you will just have to trust me that this system totally works, because if I showed you pictures of my nupps right now, you would think they look like crap. But that’s because all lace knitting looks like crap until it’s been blocked, I swear. I used cheat #2 on my Swallowtail shawl, and it came out just fine, and frankly, cheat #2 is the only one that could make much of a difference in appearance — cheat #1 is just a way to avoid having to try to eyeball how loose your tension should be.

So go forth, knit nupps, and be merry — and try not to think too hard about the phrase “pictures of my nupps.”

*You have no idea how much pleasure it gives me to type that phrase (the one at the top, where the footnote was, you weirdo), let alone how much pleasure it gives me to realize that I probably belong in that category.

At the Kitchen Table Doing Shots of Resignation

beadshot

Friends, this Aeolian will be the death of me. What you see here is the shot glass I am using to hold my beads. I’m sure that people who use beads regularly have fancy little trays for this purpose — in fact, I’d bet you five bucks that you can buy handmade fancy little trays for this purpose on Etsy with pictures of fairies lovingly painted on them — but I prefer to use what I have on hand. I had planned to do 8 repeats of the yucca chart and 1 of the agave chart, but I somehow failed to count to 8 and instead did 9 repeats of the yucca, which is a problem because the agave chart doesn’t work if you do an odd number of repeats. (Guess how I know. Hint: the answer is not “I read the pattern carefully.”) When faced with the decision of whether to painstakingly tink back 8 enormous shawl rows or just plow ahead and knit another 8 for a total of 10 repeats of the yucca, I chose the easy way out, knowing full well that it might lead to Shawl Giganticism and/or Stabbing My Eyes Out Because Of The Insanely Large Number Of Stitches On The Needles. I am already regretting this decision.

In better news, the beading is going pretty well. You will be bemused to know that, after showing you that picture of how tiny my beads were last time, I decided that I needed beads which were even tinier, and I hauled off and ordered some 11/0 beads while the 8/0 beads cried themselves to sleep in the purgatory of my miscellaneous-craft drawer. (Do not think I have only one craft drawer — the other two are devoted to yarn.) The problem with the 8/0 beads was twofold: 1) My yarn is extremely, extremely thin, and the 8/0 beads looked too large, and 2) I’m still hesitant about the flashiness of a beaded shawl in the first place, so I wanted the beads to be as subtle as possible. They are subtle as hell, let me tell you. I skipped the beading for the yucca charts, but I started it on the transition chart and if you squint really hard, you can see some shiny bead-ness in the upper lefthand corner of that picture up there. I swear. And of course they are also at the bottom of my shot glass.

Speaking of which, it’s ten o’clock at night and I can think of something else which maybe should be at the bottom of my shot glass, so I am signing off. Wish me luck in my quest to finish knitting this thing by Labor Day — I’m gonna need it!